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Thursday, July 30, 2009

你走了~

你還記得我們在一起的那感覺嗎?
你還記得我們在一起的每一分鐘嗎?
你還記得我們在一起手拉手的感覺嗎?
你還記得我們在一起渡過種種的痛苦嗎?


我還記得,我們在一起的那段感情,經過了不少風風雨雨,才在一起的。。而且我永遠~永遠都不會忘記。。我對你的愛多麼的深,多麼的喜歡,多麼的痛苦,我已經不能再承受了,我好心苦~也好痛苦。。三年了。。都過去了。。但是心裡還是無法忘記。。依然你在我的心裡多麼的重要。。我知道你终会离去就像美丽的日落而尽只是没有想到你会走的那样匆忙当我的心还在夏日的花香中徘徊当我的目光还在你停留过的地方凝视,当我悠长的思念还在积聚着对你的爱恋..就在這時。你却说你要走了。。其實我想跟你一起承擔一切。。一起面對種種困難。。看著你痛苦的樣子,我好辛苦,就明明好想在你面前哭出來。。卻做不到。。我不想你不開心。。所以在你面前扮一副開心的樣子~反而在你背後~一直不停的流眼淚。。你叫我別愛上你。。去喜歡別的女人。。
而且你也對我說:對不起,無法陪你走下去~原諒我好嗎?
我說:不。。不能。。不能原諒你。。我心裡。。永遠只有你。。每人能取代你在我心裡重要的位置。。我喜歡的女人,永遠只有你一個。。無論有多困難,我們都可以解決對不對?別放棄。。只要有一線的希望,我們都能活下去。

就在這時,我感覺到你的手好冰冷,手指漸漸的鬆開了,不在溫,不在像我以前握你的手的感覺~。。。
轉眼間。。你人就不在了。。而且失去的無影無蹤。。那天我的眼淚不停的流。。不停的。。~流。。
現在我每一天,每一秒。。都好想你。。為甚麼?為甚麼?天。這麼不公平,要拆散一對彼此喜歡對方,愛著對方的真實的戀人。我恨你。。!!我每一次看著我們過去的背影。。好懷念。。真的好不想你離開我。。好不捨得分手的感覺。。明明抓緊緊了轉眼又失去了。。就好像日落-美丽的日落總是就在一瞬間。。消失了。。

你走向远方的时候。。
带走的是我深深的却无法表露的执著。。一直固执的认定你来了以後就一定会陪着我走完我的人生的道路。。而你突然的离去才使我明白那只是一张我用相思累积的无法兑现的存单。。我明白你的离去有太多的无奈因为现实。。让你和我没的选择岁月的长河里。。也许会有很多想不到的风浪不能我們一起承擔。。對不起。。原諒我好嗎?
原諒我
以前珍惜你的不夠
原諒我
以前對你冷落的態度
原諒我
以前對你的愛不夠深
原諒我。。。。
對不起,我自錯了。。。

最後,有句話好想對你說。。但你現在卻無法聽得到 。。*就在這時我對這藍黑的天空喊著*

-老婆!!我愛你!!我很!!!愛你!!,可以原諒我以前做錯的一切嗎?好嗎?。。。。

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

MY BEst FAMILY !!! AND FRIENDS 4EVER -

I duno what to said? Tq. Seriously. Few droplet from my eyes flow it as usual. I feel so happy that my friend, being so supportive. TQ Sook yee!!
Tq, for everything, without you. Probably my heart will keep on thinking about her. My mind, her image, her smile, her shadow- everything about her. Without your advise, without the persuasion of yours . I might still live in darkness. And now i feel so much better. TQ....not only sook yee, my friends as well. Each of them.....kenny, leou gyn, yew kwan, kenneth, kevin and liselle=D...TQ ...for being so ..good to me....... And sorry, forgive me, being so selfish previously.........................sorry ...
FORGIVE M3......i promise you guys, im not gonna think about her anymore....and i will just focus on my studies, and the friendship of us...............

and Sook Yee sorry, when i need someone, you will be the 1st one always appear in my side. But when u need me, i will always be somewhere else. I'm sorry sook yee. im sorry. I will never abandon my friend anymore...Not only you , every single friend that i knew....I will always lend a hand or a shoulder to you guys , when you guys need me.......TQ !!!! MY FAMILIES AND MY FRIENDS.....I LOVE YOU !!

Absent today xD

Not feeling well. Book~Sick....Never heard before right? xD. Im tired, and the class having today is not so important..not all but phew of them. xD so i din went to skol today and i study myself + i clean up the house. xD....to be continue

Monday, July 27, 2009

Saishiki ~ sisiki ? whatever la xD..

As long i knew it is a japanese buffet restaurant.. and the foods were delicious.im satisfy =D.. Unagi is the best among the food i ate yesterday. Sashimi salmon not bad xD.. love it so much ~~ hmmph what else....cawan mushi ^^ wow...miss that..hahax anyway ~~~foods are delicious, same goes to friends. hahax friendly dude ~~ many jokes. xD!!..Kevin kevin ~~my gay partner lolx..~~jkjk~~~ anyway..it was so much fun yesterday .~~ erh~~ xD. Thats all what i wanted to post today...To be CONTINUE ~ =D

Sunday, July 26, 2009

Happy~

Hei..im so happy today, we like back to normal, but not normal as previously. But im SOSOSOSOSOSOSO HAPPY,felicitous......HAHAX....i dun care whether is truth or fake. But as long i see you smile...HAHAH!!! im just satisfy to see you happy even though you might be with someone else. TQ, TQ, TQ, TQ !!!

Saturday, July 25, 2009

Finally ~^^

phew, i feel better now,much better hahax. And something i din expected, it happen hahax. Anyway just like i used to said. do whatever u want, as long you like it , dun give up, i will always support whatever decision u made.XD, of course i do wish we could get back the friendship between us. Just friend. But because of something else. I was hardly/force to made this kind of decision. But i never remorse/regret. Just as long you happy, i could do whatever you like.hahax, dun worry i will know ,you never view my blog after all. So these kind of stuff, i post just to release my anger or the pain of mine. hahax...promise me , be with you love ones 4ever, and be happy always

Friday, July 24, 2009

我就是那麼的自私,而且我沒有那麼的伟大

我没有那么伟大就像你的前男友
我知道
我并不能忘记你,不能挽回我們在一起玩的那段很好的感情
也不能不愛你
都说只要自己爱的人幸福就好
我知道自己做不到
我想要的是我跟你在一起的幸福
不是只有看着你幸福。
我的爱,没有那么伟大
虽然这才是我最想要的
但我不会再跟你说,
不想再打扰你的生活
我只会对你说祝福你和“对不起”这三个字,对不起-我以前所做錯的一切
却不会再对你说我爱你
我只能尽我所能不去打扰你
不去想你,不去爱你
把你忘记的一干二淨
可是,我可以用欺骗来安慰伤痛吗?
我想要继续的哭泣不得不终止
想要挣扎的勇气不得不呼吸
想要释放的感伤不得不收敛
因為我想做出一副沒事的樣子
不想要別人為我而擔心
我的爱,没有那么伟大
我也不希望它那么伟大
我的私心
不会让你知道
不会任何人知道
我敢承认
我爱的是你
我不能说爱的也是你
我希望有一天你会看见这篇文章
希望你不会忘记我
我的爱就是那麼的自私
只因为对象是你
没有甚麼好後虧的,
現在我只有一句话,想對你說
也是最不能对你说的话
就是
-我爱你-

Thursday, July 23, 2009

24/7/09--Hyper

Orhx, what the hell~~~ why everyone so hyper today xD... especially during the bio science class. xD we are discussing about the Preservation and Conservation of the Environment.~~ lolx actually ms.kasturi wrote/draw the web ~ related to the consumer ~~ u guys know right xD. 


Ms.Kasturi: Ok, what happen to the others consumer if without the primary consumer?

These What she draw PADDY(PRODUCER)--->>RATS(PRIMARY CONSUMER) AND ANOTHER CONSUMER)------>>> SNAKE, CHICKEN AND FROGS ( SECONDARY CONSUMER)---->>>EAGLE AND HUMAN ( TERTIARY CONSUMER)

Pei Ying: PADDY FIELD INCREASE !!! Others maintain
STeven: No ~~~, EVERYONE INCREASE BECAUSE OF THE CHICKEN---EAT PADDY.XD
Pei Ying: NO !!!! Chicken not eating paddy ~~..-_-....!!!
Steven : YES !!!!
Kenneth: er huh?
Pei Ying: NO !!!!!
Steven : YES !!!

At the same time ms.kasturi -_-.....
Ms.Kasturi: Chicken eat paddy -_-...Pei ying
Steven: NAH !!! SEE ?...
Pei Ying: NO !!!!!!
Ms.Kasturi: now u are the teacher or im the teacher? excuse me ?...NOW GET BACK INTO YOUR PLACE...
Everyone silent..lolx....

nth much farny actually, just i wrote it for fun xD.....normal conversation xD

I couldnt concentrate on my studies today- 23/7/09

I duno why...i don't know what is wrong with me today. I couldn't concentrate on my studies at all. I read the whole sentence and i was like' what '? and i keep repeating the same sentence for few times but yet i couldn't get these things in my mind. Something wrong with me today . Probably im exhausted, mind stress. I don't know what to do. Perhaps i should take some rest, and get myself into good condition, so i could concentrate again. Ah~!!!, nvm lahx, i continue tmrw, damn wasted like 2hours ...T_T

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

16 days

These 16 days i din call you, not even a single message i send to you. I tried to ignore you and trying to forget everything about you for these 7 weeks which is 49 days. But today i sent u a message. i duno why ? im just still worried* . Someone told me u din went to school today. I thought u were having fever or somehow. Later on, u replied me and i dun have any feeling, i dun feel happy or remorse. Just normal like friends, i duno why. we like back to the friendship that we used to be. i knew i still love you, but not deep as previously. Probably after i heard that stuff, that u said. ---This is called love? Ya, i not love as deep as your xbf, but i had put so much effort try to be the good, the best, the perfect one, i wanted to be the important position in your heart previously. But at the end, i give up , and i have done so much things to u but you will never know.I never blame you for that.At the same time, I feel so stupid, why i being so good to you, worried about you? Even though u dun like me anymore? I keep repeating the same question. But i still couldn't get the right answer. Well, i just wish i could look at you, protect you all the time and i will maintain the distance between you and me. Promise me, be happy always.

Tuesday-~ 21 july 2009 -- WHAT a boring day~!!!

Well....nothing much happy today, 1 word bored !!!! breakfast- lunch - school- comeback study for 4 hours--- at the same time i was duno wth im reading or studying - as long i knw i was wasting time lOLX..!!!!!!swt......to be continue ------Wednesday 22 july 2009

Monday, July 20, 2009

Bored !!

Im so BORED today doing nothing 1st 2 period. Doing Nothing cuz i drop account subject ~~ replace general Science....AHH~~!!!! bored -_-....Update my blog, cHange Lay Out ....awww BORED, BORED,BORED !!!!xD.....STUDY LA ! THEN ? XD lolx

Last saturday, i went to wayee house celebrate her bday party, i was not that late after all..xD....well i was having so much fun on that day, the cooperation between me and scott were extreamly good xD....we can be super-star future xD...lolx..we sang from 4-7 pm ...and later on ground floor was fully packed with people. adults and kids...gosh~~~ ....the food was nice , delicious xD..especially the satay.....later on i was drank few cans of beer, and i was drunk....i knew wat im doing, but i couldnt control it, ....im totally drunk, my face was hot and red. And im telling the truth, i duno what i had said out. But as long i knw is quite embarassing. I did asked a question from kenny whether u wan to c my underwear colour* GOSH ~~embarassing though.!!!!...and i laugh out without nothing...seriously is ....damn !!! but i din like those real drunk people - who used to sex hormones always came out when they are drunk....ewww~~...but i was like a clown -_-....anyway.....i dun think i gonna drink anymore beer, nt eve a single cans, cuz i knew it was dangerous xD.....ok ....the ends lOLX...bye bye xD

Thursday, July 16, 2009

不應該愛的太深

如果相逢是错,我愿意一错再错……
如果相爱不知路尽头,我情愿一生徘徊等候。

不管将来相伴一生的是谁,你都在我心底最不可触摸的角落。
也许当岁月与铅华都遗忘的时候;
你我还能以一种近似当初的心来彼此慰籍。
还爱着,只是有太多的原因造就了这一结果。
无法相守的一生注定了我们缘浅于此。
真的好想像当初梦的、畅想的那样。

生命因爱情而美丽,在历经了太多的人生苦难之后,终才知道,
有些话说了就收不回,有些事情做了也无法回头。
没有是非对错,一切都是上天在捉弄我。
爱着,是一件多么美妙的情感,思念着,却无法相守,
是一场耐人寻味的爱恋,凄苦而无奈。

为什么相爱的人不能在一起?
为什么所有的爱情故事都要是半生缘?
为什么只能选择自己不爱的人?
不相爱的两个人为何却偏偏注定要相伴一生?

问情为何物?
只一句“情乃折磨人的咒语”
放弃,
只因为爱的太深,爱太深,才对自己没把握,
要用放弃做赌注,输了,只因对方不够爱你……



爱得太深或许也是一种错
爱得太深或许注定会寂寞

茫茫人海中
相遇,相识,相知,相恋
都算是一种缘份 一种感动

多年以后
回过头
却发现
曾经爱过的人都已走远
曾经执着的爱情都只是场空

是爱情是空还是人是空
是爱太复杂还是人太复杂

爱原本是简单的
只是我们想得太复杂

冰冷的房间
冷冷的夜晚
冰凉的身躯

不敢再回味

多年以前,多年以后
守在你身边的人又会在哪里

漆黑的夜,我看不到自己心灵的深处还藏着谁的影子……

Thursday, July 2, 2009

I feel uncomfortable these days, i thought these things, these cases were settle. But why? the way you react ...it shows hate,ignore,away from me. I'm not gonna mention anything about what is going on with me. But i do feel something remorse,desperate and guilty. There is many misunderstanding between you and me. I feel i hate myself, being so selfish, didn't care about your feelings deep inside your heart. I'm so sorry, the selfishness of mine,annoyance of mine. I knew even though i apologize million times to you, you will never forgive me. I knew what is wrong with me. I knew I was wrong. I also knew you keep these things inside your heart , your mind as a secret. Never gonna tell anyone. You were just standing at the corner being alone, not telling anyone/talking to anyone. I knew, i knew you feeling, your reaction , you movement what is gonna do next. i knew.i guess i unable to get back the previous feeling/friendship of us.

(_ _ _ _ _ _ ) i'm sorry, please forgive me. I promised from now on.. i'm not gonna talk to anyone except you...i never abandon you anymore. 000---sign of swearing to god(~^(00)^~)..wish we could get back the previous feeling, the 1st time we know each other..ignore the things that i said before..back to the friendship ^^ best friend..so we could hangout together again.

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